Last Updated on 28 July 2026
The final three steps are sometimes called the maintenance steps – because it is in practising these steps that we remain in recovery. Although it is possible to complete these steps relatively quickly, we continue to work these steps for the rest of our lives.
The HOW questions in this section refer to additional AA texts. You can find the specific texts included in the HOW Sponsorship Readings document:
Step 10
Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.
Step Ten in Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, SLAA’s basic text, stated (page 96), “If we were to continue the life-time process of reconciliation and intimacy with ourselves and others, we would need to process life as it was happening, day by day.”
Before answering this set of questions, we read the appropriate Step chapter in Alcoholics Anonymous, AA’s Big Book, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, and Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, SLAA’s basic text. You can also read or listen to the new (draft) SLAA texts: draft TSSE (Twelve Steps in Simplified English) and the draft SLAA 12&12.
Step 10 Daily Inventory
Create a form so you can easily complete the daily inventory form online or using an app: Using this Jotform (add the form to your own Jotform account) or this Jotform (2022 version)
>> For more information about using Jotform, visit this page.
Step 11
Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with a Power greater than ourselves, praying only for knowledge of God’s will for us and the power to carry that out.
“When you “pray,” you are supposed to take off one “thinking cap” and put on another “thinking cap” that will move you from an egocentric perspective to a soul-centric perspective… The first mind sees everything through the lens of its own private needs and hurts, angers, and memories. It is too small a lens to see truthfully or wisely or deeply. The main work of prayer (the second mind) is of emptying the mind and filling the heart.” (from Breathing under Water.)
Before answering this set of questions, we read the appropriate Step chapter in Alcoholics Anonymous, AA’s Big Book, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, and Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, SLAA’s basic text.
Step 12
Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to sex and love addicts, and to practice these principles in all areas of our lives.
We must get out of our ego-centric heads and learn to serve others.
Before answering this set of questions, we read the appropriate Step chapter in Alcoholics Anonymous, AA’s Big Book, Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, and Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous, SLAA’s basic text.
A Simple Step Twelve Completion Ritual
Completing all Twelve Steps is a monumental milestone. In recovery, Step Twelve isn’t a finish line. Rather, it is a threshold. This simple ritual is designed to mark your spiritual awakening, honour the courage it took to reach this point, and dedicate yourself to practicing these principles in all areas of our lives.
You can perform this ceremony alone, with your sponsor, or alongside a close support group.
What You Need
- A quiet, comfortable space: Somewhere you won’t be interrupted.
- A candle and matches/lighter: Representing the “inner light” or spiritual awakening.
- Your Step work notebook or journal: To anchor your journey.
- A small token: A milestone chip, a meaningful stone, or something else to carry with you afterward.
- A small slip of paper and a pen.
The Ritual
1. Centre and Light the Flame
Sit comfortably and take three slow, deliberate breaths. On each exhale, release any lingering tension or self-doubt. Light the candle: “I light this flame to honour the spiritual awakening I have experienced through these steps. I acknowledge where I began, and I give thanks for where I am today.”
2. Reflect on the Threshold
Open your journal to your early Step work. Take a few quiet minutes to remember the pain, unmanageability, or isolation that brought you to Step One. Without judgment, acknowledge how much has shifted since then—the growth in honesty, humility, and willingness.
3. Write Your Release and Commitment
On your slip of paper, write two brief lines:
- What I leave behind: (e.g., secrecy, resentment, the need for total control)
- What I bring forward: (e.g., willingness, service, daily self-reflection, faith)
Fold the paper and place your token on top of it.
4. Declare Step Twelve Aloud
Hold your hand over your heart or hold your token and speak these words aloud:
“Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to sex and love addicts, and to practice these principles in all areas of our lives.”
5. Closing Prayer or Affirmation
Pray to the Higher Power of your own understanding:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.
May I remain grounded in truth, open to ongoing growth, and committed to helping others.
I honour my past, embrace my present, and step forward into a life guided by integrity.
6. Extinguish the Flame
Blow out the candle, recognising that the light it symbolised now resides in your daily actions.
Keep your token in your pocket or at your bedside as a physical reminder of your commitment.
A Gentle Reminder: Working the steps is an initiation, not a graduation. The most effective way to keep the freedom you have gained is to share it with someone else who still needs it through sponsorship.
