Last Updated on 29 August 2024
The following books are often used by participants within 12-step programs and therapy.
With affiliate links to Amazon.com.au – also check sites like booktopia.com.au
We have found them to be helpful for finding and living the new recovery life.
The views of the authors come out of their own personal research and therapy with people in recovery.
This is non-SLAA literature. For program literature, go here.
– all of these books are available as either ebooks or physical, except the ones marked [PB only] which are only available in physical book form.
Classic books dealing with sex and love addiction
Patrick Carnes
- Out of the Shadows: Understanding Sexual Addiction
- Don’t Call It Love: Recovery From Sexual Addiction
- Sexual Anorexia: Overcoming Sexual Self-Hatred
- In the Shadows of the Net – breaking free of Compulsive Online Sexual Behaviour
- A Gentle Path through the Twelve Steps: The Classic Guide for All People in the Process of Recovery
- A Gentle Path through the Twelve Principles: Living the Values Behind the Steps
- A Gentle Path Through the 12 Steps and 12 Principles Bundle
- Facing the Shadows – starting sexual and relationship recovery – new – kindle edition now available
- Workbook Shadows of the Cross – a Christian companion to Facing the Shadow.
- The Betrayal Bond: Breaking Free of Exploitive Relationships
For partners of sex addicts
- Stephanie Carnes – Mending A Shattered Heart – A guide for partners of sex addicts
- Carol Juergenen Sheets and Allan J. Katz – Help Her Heal: An Empathy Workbook for Sex Addicts to Help Their Partners Heal
Pornography Addiction
Pornography Addiction – Fortify (Fight the New Drug)
- Fortify: The Fighter’s Guide to Overcoming Pornography Addiction
- Fight the New Drug website
- Pornfree Movement Resources
- Carl Thomas – When Shame Gets Real
- related: Your Brain on Porn: Internet Pornography and the Emerging Science of Addiction
- related: Wired for Intimacy: How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain
- Resources and links – SASH.net
- SoberNation – list of 12 step programs
- Being Men of Sexual Integrity (Shalom World)
Additional Books on recovery from addiction
- From Good Man to Valiant Man – Dr Allan Meyer
- Breaking Free – Russell Willingham
- Every Man’s Battle – Stephen Arterburn, Fred Stoker
- Delivered – Matt Fradd
- Treating Porn Addiction: the essential tools for recovery – Kevin Skinner
- He Restoreth my Soul – Donald L Hilton
- Restored – Alice Taylor
- Wack: Addicted to Internet Porn – Noah Church
- Eyes of Honour – Jonathon Welton
- At The Altar of Sexual Idolatry – Steve Gallagher
- Love You, Hate the Porn – Helping a relationship damaged by virtual infidelity – Mark Chamberlain and Geoff Steurer
- The Porn Trap – The essential guide to overcoming problems caused by pornography – Wendy Maltz and Larry Maltz
- The Final Freedom: Pioneering Sexual Addiction Recovery – Douglas Weiss
General addiction
Gabor Mate
- In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction
- The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness & Healing in a Toxic Culture
Russell Brand
- Recovery: Freedom From Our Addictions
- A copy of his program and worksheets are available here.
Curt Thompson
- Anatomy of the Soul: Surprising Connections Between Neuroscience and Spiritual Practices That Can Transform Your Life and Relationships
- The Soul of Shame – Retelling the Stories We Believe About Ourselves
- The Deepest Place: Suffering and the Formation of Hope
Family of origin work
John Bradshaw
- Healing the Shame That Binds You
- Homecoming: Reclaiming and Healing Your Inner Child
- Bradshaw On: The Family: A New Way of Creating Solid Self-Esteem
Understanding and dealing with codependency
Melody Beattie
- Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
- Beyond Codependency: And Getting Better All the Time
Pia Mellody
- [PB only] Facing Codependence [Audiobook also available]
- [PB only] – workbook Breaking Free: A Recovery Workbook For Facing Codependence
- The Intimacy Factor – The Ground Rules for Overcoming the Obstacles to Truth, Respect, and Lasting Love
Dealing with Trauma
The Body Keeps the Score – Bessel Van Der Kolk
– available in Paperback, Kindle and Audible
What Happened to You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing – Oprah Winfrey and Bruce Perry
– available in Paperback, Kindle and Audible
Working with emotions
Susan David
Jonice Webb
- Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect
- Running on Empty No More: Transform Your Relationships With Your Partner, Your Parents and Your Children
Laurel Mellin
Anna Lembke
Caroline Leaf
Tristen & Jon Collins
Johann Hari
David Richo
Sober Dating
- Mary Faulkner – Easy Does It Dating Guide: For People in Recovery
Other recommended reading
Brené Brown
- Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience
- Braving the Wilderness: The quest for true belonging and the courage to stand alone
- The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
- Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead
Richard Rohr ofm
- Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life
- Immortal Diamond: The Search for Our True Self
- Breathing Under Water: Spirituality and the Twelve Steps
Pema Chödrön
- When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times
- Meditation: How to Meditate: A Practical Guide to Making Friends with Your Mind
- Start Where You Are: A Guide To Compassionate Living
Robert Glover
- No More Mr Nice Guy – A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex, and Life
- Dating Essentials for Men: The Only Dating Guide You Will Ever Need
Bonnie Badernoch
Iain McGilchrist
Alice Miller